With All I Am

2010-05-10T22:43:00.001+08:00

new blog address: www.chowteeclaris.wordpress.com

woopeeeddoooo~ :) time for a change! :)

2010-05-08T01:56:00.002+08:00

Brian & Jacelyn's ROM

*but i dont think I can post their pictures here.. :) private and confidential.. :)*

the STARS for the night.. :) awesome couple!

how they got together is so amazing.. haha..

with Johann and Pst Aileen.. :) looking forward to their wedding in Nov.. :)

Johann is one of my SOT team mbr! powerful and funny man..
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with Pst Tan.. :)

to be in the same team as them, is really a honour!

2010-05-08T01:29:00.002+08:00

Had a week of encounters with God in SOT :)

Holy laughter, crying & deliverance..

Pst Ming laid hands on me and prayed over my life at my seat. Amazing!

Love of God is so overwhelming. Thankful to God!

It felt as though God had given me a BIG comforting HUG!

I got a deeper revelation on...

1. The Holy Spirit is a Person

- this is a very foundational truth, which I understood all along.. but there's so so much into it! so much to fathom.

2. CG Leadership is a Gift from God.

- I was feeling very sleepy that day.. but somehow, my senses was awaken by the Holy Spirit when Pst was preaching on this. Immediately, I was awaken!

One of my greatest joy this week is.. just being OPEN to God.. :)

2010-05-08T01:26:00.002+08:00

W414 FTW! :)

2010-05-06T00:15:00.002+08:00

this week marks the end of my 2nd month in SOT.. :) wheeewww!
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1. I've conquered the flesh by waking up at 640am almost every morning. :)
2. My Chinese improved tremendously. :) I can pray quite fluently in Chinese! :)
3. Did well at Mock CG too. :) evaluated by Joyce and Cindy! *honoured* and it's quite fun to be a saboteur during Mock CG!
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and the list goes on and on.. :) and of coz, blessings after blessings! walking under open heaven. :)
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1st month was Transition & Adapting stage.
2nd month was Excitement & Faith Building Stage
as I go into my 3rd month in SOT.. the main theme shall be Expecting & Relationship Building!

2010-05-03T00:26:00.002+08:00

MAY MAY MAY.

I've great anticipation for MAY. - Asia Conference!

Gotten step out of my comfort zone more.. :)

A life that is... set apart!

2010-05-03T00:20:00.002+08:00

what a HAPPY team! :)

taken during SOT fire drill... I think we have chance to get BEST TEAM award! :)

way to go! attending Wedding this Thurs at JW with them! excited!

2010-05-02T01:36:00.002+08:00

I had an interesting talk with my Boss & one of my colleagues on Friday..

Boss asked me:
What's wrong with our department? why the company turnover rate is so high? can you share with me? :) feedback lei, whats the problem.. we talked for quite long.. then She was sharing her life as a Mum, Wife, Manager.. difficult, when she gets home, her baby is sleeping, when she leave home, her baby is sleeping.. sad!
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My boss was also sharing with me on Thurs.. after I tendered, the next day, another of my colleague whom I really respected tendered too. She said that she is heartbroken.
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Another colleague is actively looking for a job too.. waiting to "throw" the letter only..
Another colleague from another department tendered for a better paying job..
Lotsa and Lotsa of people of leaving.. quite scary!
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My Boss is a super zai Boss! someone who loves challenges. Really admired her for her composure! Admired her for her passion and commitment! She won my hats off 100%.. Thank God for her!

2010-05-02T01:33:00.002+08:00

Few things I wanna do in the next 3 months (May-July)
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1. Get started on my Driving Lesson, and get my license eventually
- Somehow, I will dig the money out! When there is a will, there IS A way. Once i start working, I wont be able to afford the time! I will make it happen.. been thinking about it day & night! Having a license, I value-add myself.
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2. Build Relationships with a few people
- focus and press in!
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3. BE READY!

2010-05-02T00:54:00.002+08:00

I'm NOT satisfied with myself! NOT satisfied! ARGH!

I can BE BETTER! :)

Some updates, I will only working till 25th May. :) to rejoice or to be sad?

i choose to rejoice! though somehow, there is this uncertainty feeling on the area of finances. School Fees? Building Fund? Misc Expenses? Trust in the Lord. :) Definitely, I will go through it! God will provide. :) was talking to my SOT mbr, sharing with her.. I was telling her, I dont have any backup finances after May, etc.. then she said, God is UR backup! wow.. that moment, I was encouraged! :) When God gave the vision, He will give the provision!

Looking on the bright side, I can really get started on my assignments! I haven start at all. Very Jialat.. after work, I'm so exhausted.. after tuition, I'm so worn out.. but thank God, my bible reading is getting back on track. :)

If you have FAITH, all things are possible to those who believe! - I believe! I receive! :)

God, You are the Peace that guards my heart, the Hope that lead me on.

2010-05-01T00:35:00.002+08:00

This week has been really a stretching one! one of the week where I'm so drained.. I've not recovered from last week, Week of Morning Prayer, because of my back. :( Couldnt really sleep well on Sunday, Morning, Tuesday.. before I knew it.. the intense week started! Mock CG.. haha.. and I actually fell asleep while preparing for my Mock CG offering yesterday. Accumulated lack of sleep!
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Considering what I do when I'm awake.. My Day is maxed out..
1. SOT Class in the Morning.. Travelling to the West!
2. Work in the afternoon till 7plus.. Travelling back to the East!
3. Give Tuitions and other commitments to attend to.. Travelling here & there!
4. Started on my Assignment readings too..
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I've reached another level of threshold ever since I started SOT~
When I just started working.. everyday was a tiring day! Everyday after work, I just want to go home to rest. But right now, even with many things happening, my capacity did increased. and I'm amazed! Thank God for strength! :)
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Tired.. yes I'm! but still keeping on! :)

2010-04-26T22:24:00.003+08:00

SOT was great today.. :)

During worship, God led me to a passage. Pastor Ming got us to rehearse and repeat through for 10 times the verses that God had led us to. Somehow I dint really know why God prompted me to this passage! but I was there, speaking, confessing it for 10 over times. Internalize, memorised it.

When Pst M began his lesson.. he said "let's turn to the bible..... " we are going to look at this particular passage, line upon lines. OH MAN, I got a shock! it's the same passage that God led me to! WOW. I cant help but to keep smiling! God is so amazing.. :) at the end of the day, I understood, why I was prompted to this passage. God never leave me in doubt!

2010-04-26T21:36:00.005+08:00

was sharing this in my BS class on Saturday..

in order for us to hear what God is speaking to us, we have to ..

L.I.S.T.E.N

but before we can hear the voice of God, we first have to be..

S.I.L.E.N.T

if you realised, all the letters found in the word listen, is similarly found in the word silent. they work hand in hand together. God speaks through a still small voice, a whisper. Dont always come to God with a "complaining" attitude, "grudging" attitude. you will drown the voice of God with ur "huge waves" of complains. Learn to be still and silent, allow God to speak.. :)

2010-04-26T21:11:00.002+08:00

SOT TEAM 23

I guess this team is really unique! people from all walks of life coming together.

this is also a super spiritual team. with 3 Pastors in the team. :)

this is also power-packed team. :D you will feel so loved in our midst. :)

Liyun, Serene, and Evelyn

Evelyn is a Tai-Tai. :) but she is so nice. always driving me to town after school!

Serene is working with HSBC! she is also very nice, sometimes will drive me to PayaLebar!
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with the gentleman... Brian!

Brian was once a red-devil. got to hear his life changing testimony!

happily engaged with Jacelyn Tay!
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the aftermath of Morning PM. hahaha! all concussed.
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team photo. we have 23 people altogther.
team 23, 23 people! :D
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our steamboat outing~ :D

2010-04-24T22:59:00.000+08:00

I'm on my way home.. On the train, my eyelid is so heavy.. Thank God for the strength! Week has ended. Went for 4 of the morning PM at Jurong West! Pray pray pray.. Loves to pray at JW! Though physically very tired, but I just want more!
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Had a long long Saturday.
1. Gave tuition early in the morning!
I really dreaded waking up, I got to drag myself out of bed. Great discipline!
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2. Rush to Church, for Study Group
I taught Chemistry! So proud of myself that I can still remember the stuffs! I think my JC chem teacher had taught me well. I'm not a science person. Know nuts about science! But I'm a master in Maths! :) this is my talent!
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3.Gave BS to Chris and Evan
I can still remember the day when Pastor taught me this CL lesson. After the lesson, he passed us ministry forms to sign us up for ministry to serve! :)

4.Service with Dr Kim
I really love the way Dr Kim is. :) so much to draw from her! When she goes up to the stage, there was really an aura of love and gentleness in her. I can't help but to keep smiling throughout her preaching. Really love her! She could possibly be the best woman of God that I reallly look forward to hear!
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2010-04-18T00:43:00.002+08:00

she never fails to serve Serene and me, whenever we are studying!

she never fails to pray for us, sms us a prayer, when we are having exams!

she never fails to countdown with us, to the end of our exams!

someone who has a loving heart for her loved ones! :)

2010-04-18T00:40:00.002+08:00

it was raining..

the library is one of my fav places! to print notes, to zap note! though i've never study in there for the 3 years in my Uni life!

2010-04-18T00:33:00.001+08:00

they are the I.W.B.T members! :D

2010-04-18T00:29:00.002+08:00

thank God for Xiang & Angela! :)

they are D best lecture mates you can ever ask for! :)

2010-04-18T00:23:00.002+08:00

thank God for my Best Friend too! :)

she's one of the best student that a lecturer can have, dont sleep in class!

she's one of the best studying partner you can ever have, she learn very fast & focus v fast!

she's one of the best encourager around to me!

2010-04-18T00:18:00.002+08:00

Thank God for my parents! :)

they were so excited, that they reached before I reached the school!

they were so happy, that they were busy taking photos with their hp cameras!

they gave me a love offering too, to congratulate me! :D

2010-04-17T23:54:00.003+08:00

Thank God for friends, that are excited together with me!

Thank God for friends, that rejoices and celebrates with me!

Thank God for friends, that I know.. loves me!

Many thanks to who came down.. :)

1. Jeremy

-for helping us to take photos during our graduation! :)

2. Ruth

-took half day from work, called a cab, bought flowers, came specially down to congratulate us! :)

3. Eileen & Yannni

- for taking time out specially! for coming down and buying the gift. :)

4. Xiang & Angela

-thank you for the flowers! :) you gals's turn next yr! :D

5. Patrick and Bryan
-they brought me out for a nice dinner! followed by live band @ Dempsey. all paid for! :) i'm the "princess" for the night! hahaha. whatever I asked for, they make it happened! good guys, both taken up. one's getting married in 2 years! *bliss* they really made my day!
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6. Jieying and Huimei
- for initiating to have a cosy celebration for me! :) it meant much much much to me! really.. :)

2010-04-16T01:17:00.002+08:00

at the Bazaar last Sat :)

1.20am.. good night world! :)

grad, grad, grad later!

2010-04-15T23:38:00.002+08:00

Thursday! :)

My previous entry was a little depressing! to the extent whereby I really dont look forward to Graduation. Such a sense of spirit of heaviness. oh man oh! I cant stand myself too. was frantically looking for my convocation entry card last night! was thinking, if i lost it, then forget it.. and i went to sleep! but deep down in my heart, i was praying that I can find the card tmr morning!

Garmet of Praise is the remedy for spirit of heaviness!

started the day with praise, gradually everything was lifted up. :)

a few of my friends, got me excited about the whole thing too! friends really play a great role!

thank God for friends!

2010-04-14T22:37:00.002+08:00

University Convocation this Friday.

My parents are excited. My fellow schoolmates are excited.

Chunli, is definitely so much excited for me! This silly gal.. haha.. but, I dont know why i'm not excited about it. I dint really publicize it too. normally, if i'm excited about something, the whole world knows! hahaha.

i really dont know why!

it's the day whereby i've been dreaming of since the day i went into Uni.

it's the day whereby i really look forward to since the day i went into Uni.

oh c'mon c'mon 'cmon. Cheer up! :D

2010-04-14T22:34:00.003+08:00

IT'S TIME FOR A COMEBACK!

I will come back stronger!

didnt realise how "low" i went, until now..

2010-04-14T00:49:00.003+08:00

my appearance received a "resounding" response from my colleagues today. hahaha.

i'm so tanned NOW. but come to think of it, I dont want it.. coz I'm graduating on Friday!!!!

God is so real. :)

it's amazing when God spoke to you something!

it's even more amazing when God spoke through someone else the same thing, confirming it!

the same word, the same content.

:: Time of restoration and rebuilding ::

2010-04-12T22:09:00.002+08:00

Monday..

Today is probably the LATEST I've ever reached SOT.. 835am! not good not good. though it starts at 845am, but being early is always the best! :) tomorrow, i shall reach by 810am. :)

It isnt the usual Monday in SOT today. All of us were so ALERT. Cannot afford to lose focus!

Rev John Bevere taught in SOT today. Caught so much stuffs! Powerful messages on Breaking off from Intimidation and Revenge Being a Trap! and I'm was just so blown away by both the Messages, that I bought the Books and audio CDs! :D I did not had enough, I want to read the book!

Pst Kong is teaching in SOT next week! highly-anticipated.

All the assignments along with its deadlines are out. Honestly, I'm lagging behind already :( Think I really need to get the momentum started. Get the engines running.. Jiayou!

1030pm. heading to bed soon! headache, aching all over..

2010-04-09T22:36:00.001+08:00

they are all very young. one is 19, the other 2 is 20. :)

and me .... *pout* but i look like them! hahahaha~

YOUNG!

2010-04-09T21:51:00.002+08:00

today marks the end of my 1st month in SOT! :D

Loves the presence of God.

- just today, I cried buckets again. it was a deep encounter today.

and I've learnt to bring tissues paper!! and alot of them out. today, i gave 1 packet of tissue to my team member! :) Love to be in the presence!

Loves to pray for my dear friends.

-i'm always very excited in my spirit, when Pst say.. turn to your neighbours and pray for them!

just let the Holy Spirit lead and do a work. Holy Spirit will lead and direct what to pray or show you something in the person's life.. :)

Loves the Word of God

- I'm captivated by the Word. It opens up my mind, and renews my thinking. Never belittle the Word of God. Never take forgranted. Never. Got to be hungry for it!

I love Bible Stories, never fail to inspire me! every night, before I sleep, I will read Bible Stories on my Ipod. 2 stories per night. :) i've finished 10 stories! gained bible knowledge!

Loves the House of God

2010-04-08T22:15:00.002+08:00

Myraid of Emotions.. Stress, Sadness, Happiness, Excitement..
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We are now at HCGL lessons now for SOT. It's amazing, that 2 years ago April.. Pst Bob taught me this, and 2 years later.. Pst Bob is teaching me too! It refreshed my memory.
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2 years old, It was Pst Bob who convicted me that every single offering is sacred and important. Today, he did the same too! I went and read through my offering messages, yes.. i do keep a copy of all of it. word by word, I will pen it down, what I'm going to say.. I will make effort to go read up.. never belittle the power of an offering time! till this day, I still can remember how Pst Bob convicted me!
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As much as it refreshes my memory, it also serves as a point of reflection! what I caught 2 years ago, versa now is very different. In the remaining of the 7 lessons, Holy Spirit, I pray for remembrance and corrections to be better! what's not, prune it. what's right, deepen & strengthen it!

2010-04-06T22:30:00.002+08:00

Aww, am sick. down with food poisoning. So I decided to do things which dont require me to think too much- blogging! :P I miss school today. I missed one of the lessons that I've been waiting eagerly since 2 weeks ago!

LIFE- has been busily fruitful. with church, school, work, tuition. everyday is packed!

oh yea, I served for Choir on Monday! No worries, I'm pacing myself well. :) Gonna start on my assignment soon, if not I will be falling behind~ :)

Thankful for my SOT team mates, that will always give me a ride- Evelyn, Serene, Darryl, Aaron, Adren and Brian. I'm amazed at the adults, they really wow-ed me. Many quitted their jobs to come SOT, some are juggling between work, family and SOT. they paid the price, offered up their sacrifices. When they share their life with me, I'm v honoured, because I'm in the midst of adults who really love God. so much to learn from them!

Treat from Huimin~ Congrats on getting the AMAZING Bonus! :)

you reap what u sowed.. :)

Team 23, first teaming outing! at Swissotel Kopitiam. :)next outing.. Novena Steamboat! :)

2010-04-05T00:04:00.002+08:00

Have you ever felt that you resisted so badly in your dream?

Have you ever felt sad waking up from a dream?

Have you ever felt that your dream is so real?

had a nightmare again last night. 3 nightmares in a week. I haven been resting well! gasp.

I dreamt about separation and physical death of loved ones & death in relationships. yes i resisted badly, felt v sad, felt that it was close to reality. even when I woke up, I got to keep assuring myself that it's just a dream. The devil is at work! Pray against it!

2010-04-03T00:28:00.002+08:00

1245am

The human mind is so intricating. when we are only using 3% of our brain daily. what will happen if i use 5% of my brain, i can be a ultimate genius! cant imagine, if 100% of my brain is working, at a God-efficient level. mind-blowing! no wonder, God can create the whole of universe!

ARGH, as much I dont want to give tuition! it's happening tmr! reality is setting in soon. in fact, it's good money, i can teach.. but it's the commitment that I'm resisting! I'm using my only sleep-in day to give tuition. :( man.. this is bad! I pray for my eye area to be good!

I need to have a good good sleep! having nightmares for the past 2 nights!

2010-04-01T23:44:00.000+08:00

Death is the process that allows you to transition from the lesser to the greater.

John 12:24

"Unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain."

2010-04-01T23:09:00.002+08:00

Today in Class, finally, we had the chance to pray and to speak a word into each other's lives! Am thankful, what I prayed and spoke was spot on! :) Holy Spirit led!

MOCK CGM is coming soon! :) Looking forward to it! :)

1 more month!

2010-04-01T22:57:00.004+08:00

I must not be too pre-occupied to look ahead. I love to plan ahead.

Pray for me, I have an open door for my career after SOT! It will be a great milestone, if it come to past! God will direct.. :)

It's somewhere here! this was the picture I took last year.. I'm still visualising!

But of course, my heart in still with the Banking Industry..

2010-03-31T21:20:00.002+08:00

Give grace to people.

as much as grace is given to you, let's give it to others too.

rmb the time when you made a similar mistake, God/people shown grace to you too.

rmb the time when you are still learning, God/people shown grace to you too.

Put urself in the shoes of others, understand them. It will really encourage someone by just giving some grace.. :) you strengthen and build them up to be better!

By human nature, it's not easy to give grace. people become critical very easily.

But God is a grace-ful God. :) let's try our best to be grace-ful being. :)

Integrate grace into ur life!

2010-03-30T22:27:00.004+08:00

I went for SOT choir audition last week. It was very easy. Got through it, BUT I cant serve. very sad! coz I cant attend the practices which is after lessons. got to rush to work! :(

My company is having shutdown again. it's really a mega turn off. :( I'm on unpaid leave on EVERY Monday for the next quarter of the year! My pay is already halved since March, and now unpaid on every monday. which mean effectively, I only worked 3 weeks per month! :( :( :( :( it's affecting me financially in a big manner..

I'm gonna start giving tuition. But I dont feel happy commiting to it, though it good money. I dont feel good. One way or another, it will exhaust me. My time is trapped, there will be alot of things I cant do. Furthermore, SOT assignment has started. I will only feel the finance constraint effects in May. Trust that God will provide! got to TRUST!.

bear with me.. I'm just blabbering some concerns that is in my heart..

2010-03-29T23:25:00.002+08:00

29th Mar, Monday 1126pm

My stomach is not well.. it feels very very bloated. :( but well, that's not the main thing!

I wanna say that SOT was awesome today. :) I realised that God will speak to me MOST when I'm the most restless, tired, lethargic. It happened for the 2nd time already. I was greatly greatly ministered today. Spent close to an hour kneeling down and cried buckets upon buckets, liberating everything that was suppressed. forgotten hurts that afflicted my soul before surfaced.

My soul lay bare before God. I was nursed by the presence of God. Pst Ming got us all to write down in words, what God spoke to us. I wrote a whole chunk of paragraph. Pst got some of us to share. As they share, I was ministered too!

God, You marvel me!

Past the gates, to the outer court, to the Holy Place, into the Holies of Holies.

Deep call unto the deep.

2010-03-24T00:45:00.002+08:00

Pastor Ming said something today, which I couldnt agree more to it.

"People who are working, you have the PRIVILEGE to lean on God's strength and grace during these 6 months in SOT.."

This sentence caught my attention so much.. it's really a privilege! and it really encourages me!

and I will always remember the simple 4 words, that convicted me to keep pressing on.

every morning, when I wake up, I will remember it.

every morning, when I dont want to get off the bed, I will remember it.

everytime, when I feel that everything is so difficult, I will remember it.

everytime, when I asked myself, afterall is it worth it? I will remember it.

2010-03-17T21:32:00.000+08:00

VERSE
THE HIGHEST CALL, MY GREATEST CALL IS LOVING YOU
YOUR PERFECT LOVE HAS WON MY HEART
NOW I AM YOURS
YOUR SACRIFICE DEMANDS MY LIFE
I WILL LIVE TO HONOUR
YOUR HOLY NAME
THE PRICE YOU PAID
SO I SING~
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CHORUS
YOU'RE MY FIRST LOVE
YOU'RE MY TRUE LOVE
YOU'RE MY REASON
YOU ARE WHY I BREATHE
I WILL GIVE YOU MY DEVOTION
ALL OF ME, ALL OF ME
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BRIDGE
YOU CHOSE THE CROSS,
YOU CHOSE ME
SURRENDERED YOUR LIFE,
AS YOU CHOSE ME
THOUGH I DID NOT DESERVE,
YOU CHOSE ME
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SO I CHOOSE TO LOVE,
JUST AS YOU CHOSE ME
I PUT YOU FIRST,
AS YOU FIRST LOVED ME
I'LL TREASURE YOUR GRACE,
AS YOU DIED FOR ME

2010-03-14T23:05:00.002+08:00

ultimately, when everything else is stripped bare, what matters the most is still our attitude.

it does not matter how reputable or how rich we are, what matters the most is still our attitude.

it does not matter whether we win or lose, our attitude has always got to be right.

I'm watching my attitude very closely. I pray for corrections. I pray for guidance.

2010-03-14T22:53:00.002+08:00

without fail, I'll always be encouraged when people told me.. "I prayed for you.. "

I'm a very word person. simple word may not be of significance or impact, but to me I will remember it v clearly. :) thank God for angels that He planted in my life!

2010-03-14T22:39:00.002+08:00

Gift from Huimei.. I'm Surprised & Touched.. :) Encouraged by the words inside..

Yay, I've a notebook for SOT! :)

2010-03-14T01:13:00.003+08:00

Remembered something Pst Meng was sharing at one of the Morning PMs..

"The greater your tribulation, the more God will be manifested in your situation"..

I believe everything will turn out good for the 6 next months. :) I believe that I can make it.

Ever since the start of the year, everything was rough and difficult.

There is a time and season for everything. After every season, we will emerge stronger.

Life with God, is never dull. full of challenging moments. JIAYOU!

God will not shortchange!

2010-03-12T23:36:00.002+08:00

12th March~

You know when we play the boxing game on WII, there are times where you be beaten and beaten, until you strike down. yes, that's where I was. but the player can shake the nuchuts to revive the boxer. shake shake shake, and the boxer starts standing up to fight? :) God shook me big time! not once, not twice, but many times. and indeed His Word brings life.

My Week started proper on WEDNESDAY! *a miracle happened that morning*

Wed: I had lunch with my HR friend, Esther at Parkway! :P

- she is my chatting partner at work over Gmail. We worked at different floors!

- had KFC STUDENT MEAL! :P still a student! hooray!

Thurs: I had lunch with my Boss, Mentor & Snr Supply Chain Planner, Irene!

- we went HK cafe at Siglap. :) one of my happiest lunches :)

- Got to know them better.. :)

Friday: I had lunch with my Adeline the Engineer, Aw the Snr Supply Chain Planner, David the Nonsense man.

- all of them are x2 of my age. :) interesting aye!

- but age does not indicate maturity at all. I was telling them, perhaps on my last day, I should feedback to the Director. not to challenge authority, but to speak the truth in a tactful manner.

2010-03-11T00:18:00.002+08:00

GOD IS AWESOME!

Today.. 10 March 2010..

God showed me the 100% Impossible becoming a 100% possible

God assured me that everything is gonna be alright!

Nothing is Impossible. Nothing Nothing Nothing is Impossible!

Prayers that was made since last August, came to past. :)

Today, God literally shook my whole weary & discouraged heart big time!

Today, God literally revived my heart. a new heart & a new spirit, i pray..

CHOW TEE, wake up!

CHOW TEE, stand up on your feet!

CHOW TEE, keep on believing!

and God, I believe if You can do it for me once, You can do it again & again & again!

2010-03-08T00:51:00.003+08:00

Remember.. Remembered.. Remembrance

will stop blogging for a period of time, will come back soon :)..

2010-03-06T02:04:00.001+08:00

Hide me now, Under Ur wings

Cover me, within Ur mighty hands

2010-03-06T01:04:00.002+08:00

March 7th.. it's MY 4th ARISE & BUILD! :)

This time round is so different. I'm pledging really in faith!

With no visibility on my income, zero visibility.. But let faith arise! Faith pleases God. :)

2010-03-04T23:51:00.002+08:00

It feels so wonderful to just sit down by the beach. and just enjoy the breeze that is blowing against me. It keeps me calm at heart and very relaxed. Totally love it!

This was the BEST part of my great Thursday!
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The Heaven. The Earth.. The Ocean..

2010-03-04T23:16:00.002+08:00

Although my night ended in a low note yesterday, but I refused to let it affect my mood today. Kept confessing.. I'll rejoice and be glad in it! :) and yes, good day it was! :)

Cycled at ECP.. Watched a Movie.. Played Monopoly Deal..

Ate Satays.. Sugercane Juice.. KOI milk tea.. Sushi.. Selegie Dou Hua..

Good and Fruitful Day! :)

Serene and I were so serious about exercising, that we bought a top from Adidas each yesterday to just exercise. We were looking around for shorts, but to no avail. It's time to be serious. I think for me, as I grew older, I got to put in more effort! For health sake, I will do it!

As I recalled what happened last Sunday, with Eileen and Garrick at Starbucks.. I cant help but to smile. Because I was so amused by Garrick. We talked and shared about life issues! Thank God for open-ness to share.. :) It's so far the best fellowship, I had with Garrick! I look at quality.. :) God, I pray for more of such fellowship!

2010-03-04T00:01:00.003+08:00

12:08am

Not angry.. but disappointed big time!

perhaps, I should just accept it? or perhaps, should I just let go?

God says.. I'm silly to have let go, and thinking about it, yes silly! but, it's affecting me big time.

Giving up a greater cause/vision for an issue that can be solved..

2010-03-03T00:50:00.002+08:00

A TEAM- UNITY IS STRENGTH!

I saw something that provoked me at work today. People did not communicate at work, you thought, I assume, who confirm uh? People are too overly consumed in their own work, moving as an individual entity. Zero teamwork seen. Ended up pointing fingers at each other.

People raising voices at each other, without getting to the root of the problem= waste of time!

C'mon C'mon.. think BIGGER! look FURTHER!

A House divided against itself WILL NOT stand.

How to perform well as a department? Answer: UNITY & COMMUNICATE

My mentor has been holding the fort for the past 3 months. She is really capable and responsible! someone that really looks at the bigger picture. beyond herself. no wonder, my Boss will choose her to stand in for her during Maternity. :)

Attitude determines your altitude!

2010-03-03T00:30:00.002+08:00

I just get busier and busier at work everyday.. happier at work too! Alot of them are asking me to stay, revoke the resignation. I'm making more and more new friends at work everyday. I went for lunch with 2 Managers and their team of Engineers on Monday. Today, I went out for lunch with colleague from Shipping Department. :) I can navigate myself quite well already.
It will be a happy ending to my work.. :)
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I did not manage to go for an Interview with OCBC on Monday. silly isnt it. happy or sad? It was a good position, according to Rae. But I've too much things to do at work already. Didnt manage to apply for leave. Alot of people are on MC. I'm praying for more open doors!
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I'm so touched at work today. :) I've one colleague, I call him Uncle David. He asked me if I found any job yet. Then he probed more, about my interest and all. He is going to help me to call up one of his friends who is holding quite a high position, to check for availability. :) Simple gesture, I'm v touched. :)
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2010-03-02T00:09:00.002+08:00

I got to worrrrkkkkkk harrrrddddddddd~

am so depressed over one obvious fact~

this is not going to happen, I will put a stop to it~

at all cost, at all means~

2010-03-01T22:44:00.002+08:00

I'm so excited. :) I'm going to SOT! :) I can serve in the Choir! :)

It has always been my secret desire to go back to the Choir stage to serve God!

I guess a "Tsunami" is coming. But I guess I'm ready for a surf! :)

我真的累了, for the past 1 month, but now I'm gaining strength and momentum now.

Hardpressed but not crushed.

When a wave comes..

1. you ride on it and enjoy the breeze of it

2. you submerged, caught within and drowned

2010-03-01T22:41:00.002+08:00

Qiuping.. One of my dear friends! Knowing you are reading this.. jiayou! :)

May the wisdom of God be with you as you plan which job to settle into now.. :)

2010-02-27T23:40:00.002+08:00

Now I realised, why I was feeling giddy the whole of friday..
Now I realised, why I have no appetite today, only ate 1 small bowl of porridge..
Now I realised, why I'm feeling so cold today.. *burrr*
I'm sick.. :( I thought it was the hot weather, that's why I'm feeling warm. Not a good time to be sick.
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Anyway, I had a great BS with Christopher today! :) I'm so encouraged by him when he shared about the goodness of God in his life! great testimony!
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Today's Service was amazing too. God brought me back on a time-machine to 2 separate instances. The remembrance of a prayer I made to him 2 years back. The remembrance of what He spoke 2.5 years back in one of the Services! God remembers every single prayer we made. We may forget what we prayed, but God will never.

2010-02-27T01:30:00.002+08:00

Many people may start together with you at the starting line.

You can be slower, You can be faster.. but what matter most is not being the first, nor the last, but you finish the race well. You can still get to the Promise!

Many people may start together with you at the starting line.

They can be very excited, but halfway, they gave up pressing on, and fall waywards.

Got discouraged. Give them a hand, pull them back!

Enter the race with an attitude of confidence and an attitude of endurance. :)

The Banner of Victory is JUST right ahead.

2010-02-27T00:38:00.002+08:00

Hebrews 10: 34-36

".. knowing that you have a better and an enduring possession for yourselves in heaven. Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise"

2 keys words: Confidence + Endurance

Do NOT cast away your confidence in God. Hold it steadfast, and grab it tight to your heart.

your confidence in God will bring you into the eternity of God.

Need of endurance to run finish the race with confidence. Finish the race well. :)

Eph 3:12

in whom we have boldness and access with confidence through faith in Him.

2010-02-26T23:58:00.003+08:00

Taking Photos IS A JOY!

Is not that I dont have anything to do, or I'm too free. When you take photos, you are actually in a way serving others. By helping them to capture the moment, helping them to upload. :) had an amazing week! :)

Tues- Zone Meeting. :)

Happy Birthday Kelvin. :)
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Eric's Farewell Lunch.. :)

Eric is one of the Engineers that left us for better prospect in China. :)

All the Best. One of the best Engineer that a company can ever have!

Thank you for all your help all these while! :)
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Grace, Bryan and Garrick's Surprise Bdae Celebration. :)

ALL of them are 18years old! :) I was 18 once too!
18 like a flower..

Happy Birthday my dear ones! :)
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Steamboat at Lynn's Place

2010-02-26T00:16:00.002+08:00

For a moment today, I felt so bad about myself. :(

1. It happened when my Mentor slammed her laptop, walked away and say.. I'm not going to bother about this major project anymore, dont look for me, look for so and so. The major project that she is handling now, is what I'm supposed to handle. It was my responsibility, now it falls back unto her shoulder, when she is handling so many things.

2. It happened when my Mentor asked this colleague of mine if he can take over this project. So my that colleague just plainly said that he doesnt have time, without even considering much. and that project was supposed to be my responsibility too. sigh.

3 person's work = 1 person's work. she's really amazing!

So now, even if I have to stay till v late to work, I will do it no matter what, to help her to the best of my ability.

2010-02-25T23:09:00.003+08:00

I had a long, fruitful, amazing, productive, great, fantastic day! It only ended at 11pm.

I had a greet meeting at 830pm today.

Someone great, spoke great things into my life!

Someone with real substance, brought my perspective and mindset to another level.

Someone who is so humble and down to earth, I'm honoured.

I'm deeply inspired and encouraged by his words.

It's been a longest time, since I felt so challenged and provoked in my perspective and thoughts!

i'm so tired physically. my brain is v tired. bad headache the whole day.

but i'm happy. for a moment, I love my work!

2010-02-24T23:51:00.001+08:00

AVANTE! :)

2010-02-24T23:03:00.003+08:00

I'm ON LEAVE again. I can't believe it. 1 day, "forced" to go on leave!

But, I really needed that 1 day leave, I guess! :)

I've a CRAZY IDEA, which I will need a day to realize it! :) all excited about it, i've been thinking about this idea for 2 days. It's really a workable idea, and from this idea, it will bear forth fruits. :) my eyes is fixed on that "harvest field".

If I could see the future and how this plays out

I bet it’s better than where we are now

But after going through this, it’s easier to see the reason why

It’s no surprise I won’t be here tomorrow

I can’t believe that I stayed till today

Yeah you and I will be a tough act to follow

But I know in time we’ll find this was no surprise

I was so excited, that I ran home just now after alighting from the bus, in my new sport shoes. :)

I see a glimpse of HOPE. :)

I got a revelation today from the word "LIGHT".

I got a revelation yesterday from the word "LIKENESS". and Kel preached on it! wow!

2010-02-24T01:17:00.002+08:00

BUDGET SPEECH 2010!

I spent 1 hour reading through and understanding the whole Budget report :) The whole report is SO SO detailed and SO comprehensive. With all the figures and statistics, graphs. I really enjoyed reading it! It triggered my thought process, like why the government is doing all that they are doing. and they are really looking into future. Coupled up with the coming Elections, I think they made a few wise moves! In my own perspective, I feel this year the Budget measures are good! :)

I love maths, statistics and graphs ALOT. so this kind of things interest me ALOT too. :)

2010-02-24T01:08:00.003+08:00

I'M SMART! everyday I confess "I'm smart"..

When I talk.. I will say.. "I think I very smart!".. :) if you know me!

this is one of my pet phrases too!

and today, my Senior Boss said to me.. "you are very smart!"

Some powerpoint with excel thing, which just need alittle bit of time to figure it out.

which is very simple to me, actually wow-ed him! :) he cant believe I did it!

I'm encouraged by the 4 words! thank you for speaking into my life.. :)

2010-02-22T23:20:00.003+08:00

today is one of the day, whereby I'm really in my own world.

not on the negative side, but rather a positive one.

I would choose to talk the minimal & just be on the sideline to observe

Walking against the evening breeze..

Listening to my songs..

and I really love this kind of "self-moments".. :)

2010-02-22T23:04:00.002+08:00

first day of work. I was early, to do work!

after 10 good days of holidays, and 10 days of not waking up before 11am. Today I woke up at before 7am! what a BIG struggle physically. And I slept at 2am previous night, doing something v important. and true enough, my body was in a sleeping mode the entire morning. but I'm happy to be back at work! :) Everyone is so busy at work today!

Wanted to go for evening PM, but I reached Clarke Quay at 7pm, just nice ended. :( but had dinner with Garrick. followed by a short but fruitful discussion with the Leaders!

am going to sleep by 1115pm. looking forward to sleep!

Tuesday is approaching!

2010-02-20T04:22:00.002+08:00

When I was praying last night, these 3 sights kept appearing in my sight and mind..

there is a meaning behind every sight. :)

2010-02-20T03:42:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, I really wish that time can just freeze.

Sometimes, I really wish that time can move slower, tick slower..

Sometimes, I really wish that I can rewind time back to various deciding points..

still very apprehensive about year 2010.

Eager to unfold the remaining year, paradoxically yet holding back ..

I got a feeling that God is going to bring me on a journey..

a journey which will take all of me, literally.

a journey which will bring me to various "places" of life.

yes, I'm already out of my comfort zone for a month, it's getting uneasy. and this is just the beginning!

Be a Fighter! I can be ONE. Courage.

2010-02-20T02:17:00.004+08:00

My proud possession! :D

It comprises of 6 CDs, total of 88 songs. totally worth the money! :)

My Good Friend &Leader, Lynn..

love this friend and leader of mine.. :) she is unique, not what you normally see her to be!
everyone has their good points and of coz their flaws, no one is perfect. but when you love someone as a friend, you love both sides of it. you accept it with love. :)
she is a simple and genuine person.
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&
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Love this lamp.. :) but it's expensive!

2010-02-19T14:32:00.003+08:00

as much as I love to patronised Popular, I love to go Borders too.. :)

I can spend hour there, reading books and magazines!

this is really one of my "soul food" to go there.. love the smell of new books! :)

2010-02-19T02:29:00.002+08:00

ILOVE HMV! :)

I love to go HMV, I can spend quite abit of time there~

A place, where song artistes sell the end product of their talent! A CD which was once worth $30, now it's $18. the depreciation of it is drastic, due to the commonality in internet downloading. price of CD is elastic. High elasticity!

and I really love "THE CD SHOP" at Raffles City! I'm always that tempted to buy the High Society CD from there, but it's always so expensive! I cant bear to buy it for myself.

2010-02-19T02:21:00.002+08:00

72 Tenants of Prosperity

My first HK movie on the big screen! It has a huge cast, with all the famous HK stars. It's worth a watch, during weekday noon, not for the weekends.. :)
V day is better than this! Overall, it's still quite a comedy!

2010-02-16T04:54:00.004+08:00

Little Big Solider

plot is good! :) twist and turn. Interesting war comedy too~ Definitely, a good worth to catch it!

Wang Lihom acted well in it as a General.. :)

2010-02-16T04:44:00.002+08:00

Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief

awesome show.. :) Love it too! definitely worth to watch it! :)

2010-02-16T04:34:00.003+08:00

Yea, it does not have depth.. but I love the simplicity of the show.. :) just LOVE. :)

Simple show.. Relatively a comedy.. :) but I enjoyed it totally!

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today was a fairytale, you were the prince

i used to be a damsel in distress

you took me by the hand

and you picked me up at six

today was a fairytale

i wore a dress, you wore a dark grey t-shirt

you told me i was pretty when i looked like a mess

today was a fairytale.

time slows down whenever you're around.

can you feel this magic in the air?

it must've been the way you kissed me

fell in love when i saw you standing there

it must have been the way

today was a fairytale

2010-02-15T02:57:00.003+08:00

Happy CNY! dawn of CHU ER!

3am.. I just penned down what I need to do about my life from today forth till March 12th :)

what I'm expecting..

what I need to do to..

what I'm going for..

clear. precise. direct. written down. all short term goals but with long term benefits!

YES, I'M GONNA DO IT! I GOT TO DO IT! there is no shortcut.

saw my goal card for year 2008, 2009 when I was doing spring cleaning 2 nights ago.. oh Man, I could do alot alot better! Let procastination not get a hold of me! This is where my competitive nature will come in place, I'm competitive with myself! Let my competitive nature overtakes my procastinative nature. :)

All's well, and it will end well. :) jiayou!

Someday we will know..

2010-02-15T02:35:00.004+08:00

240am! I just finished watching a movie..

A Walk To Remember

it's a very nice and touching show.. :) this is my 2nd time watching it! totally love it! it was released in year 2002, watched it when I was in Sec 3!

What is Love?

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

someday, we'll know love can move a mountain.. :)

2010-02-12T02:12:00.003+08:00

the last time we met was 14months ago!

The topic that we talked about during our meetups, is interesting! talked about managing a company, medical science and getting married. it's quite nice to hear a guy's viewpoint about marriage.. :)
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Bryan, he is looking at cells every single day. Analysing which cell is cancerous etc. He himself became more health conscious. I gained some knowledge from him too about cancer. He's a very outgoing person, happily attached. :) he's a thinker, think deep, look far!

Patrick.. Assistant GM now, he's a visionary, but act only when it's the right time. few years ago, his dream was to attain a good degree and assist the Dad in his business! and yea, he's doing it NOW. :) it's so amazing to see a wish/dream being transcended into reality..

. this was in year 2006!

when I was 19, and they were 22.. when the guys are still in NS!

2010-02-12T00:28:00.003+08:00

Before I forget, I just wanna say that.. I had a great time worshipping God at CGM last Sunday. :) as I engaged my heart close to God, I kept tearing.

God gave me a verse in the first worship song.

I John 4:19- We love Him because He first loved us.

Then I was reminded of the "Fatherhood of God" CL lesson 2 that I gave to Chris and Evan on Friday. Our Father in Heaven first love us, even before we can love Him, God has already given us His unconditional love. We are so significant in His sight and we can be so secured in Him. But we have to know who is HE. the beginning, the alpha, the source of all things. :) I was very ministered by what I taught them when I was worshipping. It's like the Word of God that is preached forth, coming back to minister to my heart condition. :) It's so important to know the Fatherhood of God. Knowing your identity in God.

The Love that our Father has for us is ... Higher than the Heaven

The Mercies that our Father has for us is.. Deeper than the Earth

The Grace that our Father has for us is.. Wider than the Ocean

Love this kind of moments in the presence of God.. :)

2010-02-10T00:42:00.004+08:00

God, I've 1001 wishes :)
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I'm happy today..

I'm glad that I'm meeting Patrick & Bryan later! we were supposed to meetup during Christmas, but I was too busy. miss their jokes and nonsenses.

Both of them are v v smart and capable. One of them is now handling Father's business and the other as a Medical Technologist!

one good traits about both of them is, both are v giving and gentlemanly. :)

and of coz, they love their family. family man. :)

they are sporting too! haha..

knew them since i was 19 years old! haha.

2010-02-08T23:21:00.002+08:00

Monday.. sleepy sleepy sleepy sleepy day..

when I was at work, cant help but to keep wanting to doze off.. as such, I dint really accomplish much at work today. it's ok, tmr i shall do more work! and buck up! :)

Wanna thank Huimei and Jieying for a good dinner today. I was very tired, my eyes was 50% closing, but my heart was still open to listen. and I learnt something! :) it was a fruitful fellowship. :) we speak faith, speak joy and speak edification! although we were all so tired from a day of work, but making the effort to just fellowship, is something heartwarming to me.. appreciate them!

stop pushing me. stop pushing me to the edge. I cannot take it. :(

Let's give each other grace.. wont you? :( i'm not perfect too and people do make mistakes.

i've been saying this quite often these few weeks..

YOU ASSUME, I THOUGHT, WHO CONFIRM?

2010-02-08T02:00:00.002+08:00

WYZ's SHANGHAI NIGHT 2010. :)

i like to lao yu sheng.. but i dont like the food. hahaha~ :)

it's a once a year event! so let's LAO! LAO! LAO!

great year ahead!

US. :)

this UNIQUE family! hahaa~

at the toilet~~~~ :)

I have limited pictures, camera no battery! :)

great night of thanksgiving to God and to the Senior Leaders.

the leaders before us, have sowed their lives into the Kingdom, into Pst's vision. wow. amazing!
having an attitude of thanksgiving is so so important yet again.

2010-02-07T02:22:00.003+08:00

Lord, You’re More Than Anything
You’re More Than Gold
More Than Anything
Lord, You’re Everything To Me
I Will Never Let You Go
Never Ever Let You Go
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Your Love Is Higher, Higher Than The Heaven
Your Mercy Is Deeper, Deeper Than The Earth
Your Grace Is Wider, Wider Than The Ocean

I DREAMT about this song on Friday Night. I DREAMT about the LYRICS!

It was an encounter. I was shocked. When we sang this in Service today, it was amazing.. I thought it was the first time that I sang this song. :) totally have no recollections that we sang it last week.

i'm feeling the weight of the world on my shoulder. So much that I'm losing grip.

I need to hold on and cling on. Grit my teeth. never let go. HANG ON!

Be a Jacob. tough times dont last, tough men do.

i will emerge stronger.

realised that "valley" experiences, is good.

it makes me realised how much I need God as my main driving motivator.

without Him, I.A.N.. i m nothing..

it's a time whereby.. everything of me is peeled apart, like an onion..

it goes into the core.. it goes back to the heart. the heart. my heart.

2010-02-06T01:00:00.002+08:00

Faith puts no limit on God, and God puts no limit on faith.

God “is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us” (Eph. 3:20). The moment we succeed in breaking a limitation in your mind, there is no question whatsoever that God can follow through and make that thought a reality in our life.

I must not limit myself. must not limit my thoughts. must not limit my faith. must not.

2010-02-05T01:36:00.002+08:00

As perturbed as we may be as humans.. Life goes on!

140am. I've not heeded the doctor's advise to sleep at 11pm. I better sleep now~

let me have gooood dream! :)

2010-02-05T00:20:00.002+08:00

i.HOPE.HOPING.

Fruitful Fruitful Day. Something to be happy for!

1. Seen a Doctor. Took MC and got my medicine. very bad headache when I wakes up these few days!

2. Went to Ubi Driving Centre, to rebook my FTT and apply for PDL.

3. Went to collect my Degree Transcript at RELC Orchard.

4. Met Emily for Late Lunch at Fareast. and we went to ION to do Kel's Birthday Card. :)

5. Met Lynn for Retail Therapy and Dinner. 3 magic words.. "just buy la..* hahahaha.
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Er yes! never go work.. :) Been having very bad headache when I wakes up in the morning. i will feel totally not rested at all. It's partly due to bad dreams too. and also I faced the Computer for prolonged hours.

2010-02-04T02:15:00.003+08:00

218am now.

I had a Blessed Wed Night.. :)

1. Met up with WendyC & Jaydee. Jaydee paid for my drinks at TCC! :) 815pm-9pm

2. Jieying blessed me Taiwan Chicken Cutlet for my dinner! 915pm

3. Edwin blessed us by paying for our movie tickets! :)

So I didnt spend any for tonight. :)

We are blessed to be a blessing. I love to give. esp give food! :)

and I failed my Final Theory by 1 Question. Flipped. 44/50 qns. I'm supposed to get 45questions correctly. Abit dejected! But I'm OK. all the more, I'm so so provoked by myself to pass the next round. I only studied for 2 hours. 1 hour on Monday, 1 hour today during Lunch time. I guessed I dint sow much.. :)

2010-02-03T00:23:00.003+08:00

Alittle tired and troubled today. I think I spoke less than my quota of words today. very quiet.

My mind and heart dont seemed to be functioning at work today. got distracted quite afew times. my mind is constantly thinking of so many things. got to list them all down. settle it one by one. set priority! manage it well! many things to do.

alot of my colleagues were shocked why I'm leaving. some to got hear it a 2nd time to make sure that they are right. I think it's very shocking too. people normally tender within a month if they dont really like the job. but i'm tendered at the end of 3rd month. some of them were funny.. when i mentioned that i leaving, they said.. "wait for me to leave together la.." :) I'm going to have lunch soon with my awesome HR personnel who took care of me!

but really, pray together with me and for me to get a job with reasonable pay during this period of time. I guessed this is really one of the 3 major things in my heart now. i've searched for Job portal, not many responses. alittle sad. But i'm still believing God will perform His works! believe! Nothing is Impossible!!

when i'm praying, i'm praying for a job

when i'm eating, i'm thinking of getting a job

when i'm working, i'm thinking of a job too..

Nothing is Impossible!!

and tmr.. I'm sitting for my Final Theory Test! I think I need a miracle, I dont have time to study.. am gonna spend my lunch time reading it again.. prayerfully hope that I can pass! dont wanna spend money again to retake.

2010-02-02T00:28:00.004+08:00

I was looking through some photos.. :) All these photos reminded me of my trip to Malaysia, Terrengganu. :) it's not that bad afterall. :) I love scenic places. :)

Love the creation of God. :)

Thank God for Lynn's camera. tons of pictures!

kindness of this cab driver, is kept in my remembrance. :)

Lynn took this! :)

isnt this pic nice? :)
i'm as tall as the infrastructure. :)

like the wailing wall of Israel. :) I want to go Israel too if there's chance one day!

this place is a very nice place.. to learn about the infrastructure of the famous landmarks of the World. All the landmarks are in miniature forms. nice!

I want to go for Holiday in the first week of September! :)

But it's too early to plan~ :) let me go dream about it first!
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today, my nice colleague, bought gifts for me and my mentor! :) so sweet.

it's 1am now. i dont feel like sleeping, even though I'm tired. something is wrong!

2010-01-31T23:21:00.003+08:00

I'm thinking of taking half day off to do something v v v v v impt

- collect my degree and transcript!

2010-01-31T23:13:00.002+08:00

I appreciate Simplicity. I embrace Serenity.

More than ever before.. I yearn for a simpler life with God :)

trust a 100%

2010-01-30T00:35:00.002+08:00

SACRIFICE, set apart unto the Lord.

I got a deeper revelation of this word today.

The first thing I did at the office today was to type out my resignation letter. Nothing much, my letter is just 2 lines. short and sweet, direct to the point. and yea, I printed it out with a normal heart. Was waiting for my Boss to come in for work. waited and waited and waited.. I was feeling the anxiety. my super nice colleague talked to me, encouraged me to talk to the Boss again, to make some arrangement. She gave me hope. :) thankful for it. and Boss came for work at 5pm. (he's on MC though)

Handed over the letter of resignation. In my heart, I was still carrying hope, that perhaps there will be some arrangement that can be made. was hopeful. But when I passed him the letter, he was too busy to even read it, just glance through. and said OK. "wow", i dint even have the chance to say anything. my heart sank to the guttermost. v v v v v sad and disappointed. I went back to my seat, and I cried and cried.

and that moment, I understood the word.. SACRIFICE unto the Lord.

Never once, did I ever felt the way I felt before. it's even greater than past few Arise and Build.

I was tempted to take back the letter. very tempted. but there was another voice, that said.. "No regrets, dont look back.." yes, so with tears, I packed my table, brought home some stuffs. and left the office. I wasnt ok. It's as though I lost something very precious and close to heart.

Left the office.. and I received a sms from my mentor! and God resurrected the situation to my advantage. and I cant help but to feel so thankful and I know that God is always walking beside me. :)

2010-01-29T01:07:00.000+08:00

this is so classic!

2010-01-29T00:28:00.002+08:00

just wanna thank..
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1. Qiuping..
I hitched a free cab ride from her on Tuesday to go down to JW for Mtg. :) She came to my company to fetch me. If not I will be super super late for meeting. thank God for her! fare was $30!
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2. Pok Pok Pok
She bought me my dinner on Tuesday. :) My favourite Char Siew Bao from JP! and OCK! :) If not, I really wldnt have the time to eat dinner. and I was really very hungry!
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3. Eileen Yixin
Called her on last Saturday Morning.. to help me to get shoes padding! because my heel was quite loose. and I really couldnt walk, got to stuff tissues inside. oops. But I called her, and she bought it for me. :) so nice! thankiew. :)
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4. Lynn Lynn
Always accomodating me at your house either on Fri night/Sat night. So that I can save on cab. this really help me to save quite a bit. to have more rest, rather to spend it on travelling. :) I can sleep for extra an hour. 1 hour means alot to me. :) and I really appreciate her kindness.

2010-01-29T00:10:00.002+08:00

When I'm very angry/frustrated. you dont have to feel it, you'll see it written all over my face.

*this is one of my weak point, not good, need to change*

But give me an hour.. I will be alright.. :)

When I'm sad, you cant see it, you cant feel it too. but you know it, from the usage of my words.

Best Friend Pok, she knows it. there was this instance, when I smsed her casually, but she sensed it.

But give me a night to get past.. I will be alright.. :)

When I'm very disappointed, you cant see it or feel it too.

But I will cry as a form of release, pray a short prayer.. and sleep!